What are play and social skills
Play is voluntary engagement in self motivated activities that are normally associated with pleasure and enjoyment. Play may consist of amusing, pretend or imaginary, constructive, interpersonal (play with others) or intrapersonal (solitary play) interactions. Play is the way that children learn about the environment, their bodies and their place in the world around them.
Social skills are the skills we use everyday to interact and communicate with others. They include verbal and non-verbal communication, such as speech, gesture, facial expression and body language. A person has strong social skills if they have the knowledge of how to behave in social situations and understand both written and implied rules when communicating with others.
Why are play and social skills important?
Play is one way by which children learn. “Free” or unstructured play in early childhood is an important way that children learn about their world. Play is also an avenue through which social skills can develop. As they grow older, children learn about societal rules by making up games with rules, as well as about winning and losing and “playing fair”. They also learn about controlling their impulses in order to do well at something and about space, negotiating and problem solving. Above all, play is needed for fun and relaxation.
Social skills are vital in enabling an individual to have and maintain positive interactions with others. Many of these skills are crucial in making and sustaining friendships. Social interactions do not always run smoothly and an individual needs to be able to implement appropriate strategies, such as conflict resolution when difficulties in interactions arise. It is also important for individuals to have ’empathy’ (i.e. being able to put yourself into someone else’s shoes and recognize their feelings) as it allows someone to respond in an understanding and caring way to how others are feeling.
When a child has difficulties with play and social skills you may notice:
- Poor attention and concentration
- Flits from one activity to the next without actually playing with the item
- Upends toys on the floor
- Difficulties taking turns/sharing
- Gets upset when ‘loses’ a game
- Is not aware of others and fails to read other people’s feelings based on their verbal and non-verbal cues
- Has trouble expressing/regulating emotions
- Finds it difficult to make and maintain friendships
- Always require an adult to play with them
- Has repetitive or narrow interests in toys/play
- Prefers to play alone
- Interrupts frequently
- Is not able to maintain a topic of conversation and provides irrelevant comments during a conversation
- Speaks ‘at you’ in a conversation versus engaging in a two way conversation
- Does not understand consequences of their actions
Play builds empathy.
Role-playing games challenge kids to put themselves in someone else’s shoes and see the world from a different point of view. As a result, they gain a greater awareness of other people’s feelings and how their actions affect others. Social games may also require children to integrate the experiences of other kids from different cultural or economic backgrounds than themselves, which enhances traits like tolerance and openness.
Kids who play have better literacy and language skills.
When kids play, they must find the right words to convey their ideas, label objects in their environment, negotiate limits and boundaries, resolve disputes, share, and take turns. Together, these actions exercise a child’s language skills, helping them build a richer vocabulary and learn to use language more effectively. Group play also involves a significant amount of listening, as cooperative world-building relies on the ability to understand and apply the ideas of others.
Kids who play have more social confidence and self-esteem.
Kids, like adults, need to feel capable and autonomous. However, because they lead such structured lives, they have few opportunities to exercise their power as individuals. Throughout much of the day, kids are told what to do, where to go, and when things will happen, which contributes to feelings of frustration and helplessness.
As a child-led activity, play provides a critical outlet for these feelings and gives kids a chance to feel more in control of their lives. During pretend play, kids adopt a leadership role, creating their own rules in a setting of their choosing. They’re free to inhabit fictional positions of authority, such as pretending to be a prince or superhero, while using their motor and creative skills to support their role. As a result, they become more confident in their abilities and secure in their identity.
What Do Kids Need in Order to Play?
Kids are naturally motivated to play; however, they still need the right environment and conditions to make play accessible. To encourage your child to engage in unstructured play, make sure they have the following accommodations:
- At least an hour of free time (preferably outdoors) each day, without access to mobile devices.
- Safe, engaging spaces for play. Consider setting aside one room of your home as a dedicated playroom, and make sure your child has access to playgrounds and natural spaces near your home. In the event of inclement weather, recreation centers can also provide play opportunities. If safety is a concern in your neighborhood, learn how to supervise your child’s outdoor play inconspicuously (for example, by keeping an eye on them from within your vehicle). Avoid interfering in your child’s games; i.e., don’t criticize their ideas, give them instructions, or mediate minor disagreements. If your child wants you to participate in group play, let them take the lead in planning and coordinating the activity.
- Play materials. Allow your child to use everyday household objects as props, to build forts, etc. Provide building blocks, chalk, paints, cardboard, craft paper, and other creative supplies so your child can construct props and costumes. Your child should also have a diverse selection of figurines, vehicles, puppets, and other toys to play with.